Taking on 2013 and hoping to revitalize my life

closed doorRemember the guy I went out with 4 times? We were supposed to go out again and then he cancelled at the last minute. His excuse was slightly lame but did have the potential to be real so I assumed he was telling me the truth. After 2 weeks of not hearing from him I decided to text him.  I thought that the reason I didn’t hear from him was his aversion to texting and not his aversion to me, lol.

The reason why I say that I thought he was interested was because he acted like it when we were together. We had fun when we got together and the very last time we went out, before we parted, he asked me when we could get together again. HE ASKED ME. I didn’t fawn over him, he asked me about getting together again. A couple of days later we made plans for the date that he cancelled. He seemed enthusiastic so I am not sure what happened. Perhaps he met someone else within those couple of days between our date, no idea.

Anyway, back to texting him… we exchanged some pleasantries and then me being me, I got right to my point and asked him why I hadn’t heard from him as he had seemed to be somewhat interested… I didn’t word it like that but you get the drift. Anyway, this is the first part of what he wrote back, “I’m not privy to your expectations”. Wha? Lol. Seriously, I didn’t have any expectations. I just thought that we got along well and that, in theory, we were going to go out again. I mean, last time we were together, he asked me when we were getting together again…Well now I know, based on his formal reply that there will be no future dates. I’m not heart-broken, just glad to be in the loop.

That’s the thing about dating these days, everyone complains about the BS, but the reason there is so much BS is that people just stop talking to you. There’s no “no thanks, I’m not interested” or “let’s just be friends”. People just disappear off the planet and it’s frustrating. Everyone who dates is guilty of it, including me. We don’t want to offend the other person so we just say nothing instead of creating some sense of closure. I guess I shouldn’t complain if I’m participating in the madness but I still find it frustrating.

Comments on: "No Such Thing as Closure in the Dating Rat-Race" (9)

  1. Wow, I can really relate to this… it’s the case of the disappearing man.

    • It happens to me all the time, and online dating makes it 10 times worse I think. Good luck out there Amy!

  2. […] And then if things are still weird I can break up with him. I’m the type that prefers closure to the alternative in case you hadn’t picked that up […]

  3. yeah, i experienced that a a few weeks back. the guys suddenly went all busy and totally lost in the face of this planet. I am cool with being friends. The act itself totally lacks class.

    • I’d be interested in the guys perspective. It has to happen to them too.

      • Sometimes, I felt really dejected with all these dating game. Most of them just want sex on the first date, normally, i will state that I do not wish to proceed something so intimate on the first date itself. Call me an old-fashioned girl , but I believe physical intimacy is something where 2 persons really get to know each and building a certain level of chemistry and sexual tension before doing the deed. It is pointless to do something out of the sake of sexual release.

      • I don’t think that’s old-fashioned. It’s good to get to know someone before jumping in to bed with them. Dating is hard and frustrating. Sometimes I just take a break from it. Breaks are good, lol.

      • yeap, that’s true. sometimes it is good to take a breather, and redefining yourself before getting back into the game.

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