Taking on 2013 and hoping to revitalize my life

We Need to Talk My ex left a message on my phone today, “We need to talk.”. How is it that those 4 simple words can strike fear into the heart of anyone who hears them?

When I listened to that message my mind immediately went to a worst-case scenario which was that he wanted to tell me that he was getting engaged or to finalize our divorce.

Upon reflection, I want to know why that is my worst-case scenario, I mean I’m supposed to be over him, right? It’s been 12 years since we started having trouble and 3 1/2 years since we separated the 2nd time… how is this my worst fear realized? Sigh… I know that a part of me will always love him but I am so ready to move on. I’m tired of being alone and would like to have a new partner in life. A better partner, one that will stick with me to the end.

Anyway, he was not calling to tell me that. He was calling to tell me that he is having issues that are health-related in nature, nothing life threatening or that really concerns me but he thought that I should know. I offered an ear in case he wanted to talk but that’s it. Business as usual.

So based on today’s events, I have 3 lessons learned:

  1. People should not use the words “we need to talk” ever. It just makes the recipient of those words think bad things.
  2. My ex getting engaged or us finalizing our divorce is not actually a worst-case scenario for me.
  3. Sometimes my subconscious state is a little slow to catch up to my conscious state.
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Comments on: "“We Need to Talk” or 3 Lessons Learned" (6)

  1. I agree “we need to talk” should not be used without some kind of explanation, and never left on an answering machine! It makes my heart beat fast just thinking about the last time I heard those 4 words on my answering machine…it wasn’t as bad a situation as I had pictured, however it was stressful thinking about what we needed to talk about.

  2. Did you explain to him to never leave that message on your machine (or anyone else’s) again? Never ever?

  3. He should definitely, definitely know better. Interesting introspection though, Gwen.

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