Taking on 2013 and hoping to revitalize my life

Archive for the ‘What Do I Really Want’ Category

Choices: Pick What’s Under the Box or Behind the Curtain?

Life is full of choices. Sometimes it feels like you don’t have any or that they are being made for you but in those cases you still have choices about how to react to your lack of choice. Even choosing not to choose is making a choice. Remaining at that fork in the road instead of taking one of the paths; standing still is a choice.

Recently I had to make a choice. I weighed the pros and cons of both options and went with the slightly better of the two. I couldn’t not make a choice. I HAD to pick one. But after making a choice there is often the impending second guessing….

I’m trying not to second guess my choice. I’m trying to stick to what I still think is the better option. The problem is that neither option A nor option B were the perfect choice. Is there such a thing as a perfect choice in this game called life? Or is there making the best of a current situation? Both option A and option B showed potential and had different strengths but neither is perfect now. Could my choice be perfect later? Maybe.

I could eventually make a different choice. I’m not forced to be bound by this choice. I could still change my mind or find an option C. So many choices….

Advertisements

Dreaming of Photography

I woke up this morning from an interesting dream.

In it, I had met this sexy, young Italian man at a conference that I had helped organize. We were extremely attracted to each other and became lovers. Within a few days he had fallen in love with me and asked me to come back to Italy with him. I wasn’t sure if I wasn’t falling in love with him too so I said I would for a month. I took a short leave from work, moved to Italy and stayed with him while I pursued my writing and photography. I desperately wanted to photograph him.

I’m not sure what this dream means but it was HOT, and when I woke up it made me want to find an Italian lover and move to Italy for a month, lol.

But seriously, I’ve been thinking about photography a bit more these past few days. A friend of mine told me a couple of days ago that I had an eye for it. And then when I talked to my Mom on Friday she asked me if I had been taking any pictures recently. So I dug out my camera yesterday and went to a Pow Wow to take some shots. It was my first Pow Wow and it was pretty cool. I also took a few pictures of a crow in my backyard today.

I’m not saying I’m going to become a famous photographer but I do enjoy taking pictures so I should probably do more of it. I also need to dig out my photography book to read about taking better pictures. If you’re gonna do something, you might as well figure out how to do it better than before.

powwow
DSC_0432
powwow2
DSC_0405
powwow3
DSC_0402
DSC_0460

Adventure is Coming My Way!

I’m uber excited!!! Adventure is coming my way! During the last few days, I decided to take my kids on a road trip to see Katy Perry this summer and my boss asked me if I want to go to Vancouver next month!!

I know, can you believe it?

The road trip was kind of a spur of the moment idea and will cost big bucks but the 3 of us will have an A-MAZING time. I was actually considering not going when I discussed it with Sven and he said I should definitely do it.

I thought he would be all practical and say it was a lot of money, but what he said was, “Do it, you won’t regret it.” And I’m quite sure that I won’t regret it. Plus, it will be so exciting and it will make an awesome memory so I put down a deposit and we are doing it!!!

vancouverThe day after that, my boss asked me if I wanted to go to a conference in Vancouver. First of all, I’ll be working a booth and forced to network which I hate,but the conference is definitely going to interesting and I`ll be exposed to a different culture, plus I get to go to Vancouver and I have never been before! I’m so excited about going that even the thought of exploring Vancouver by myself has not got me down. I’m going to bring my camera, take some pictures and just enjoy.

I have been itching to go somewhere for ages and this trip to Vancouver falls on a week that I can actually go and leave the kids with their Dad. And it will be Springtime and there’ll be mountains and the Pacific ocean and flowers and grass. I am all over that! Can you tell I’m excited?

I was hoping for travel adventures with other people but that plan fell through so I’m just going to suck it up and have my own adventure! And then have another one with my kids. Adventures are good for the soul so I’m glad that I have grabbed both opportunities.

I think there are always the possibilities of adventures, you just have to agree to take part in them. I’m really excited that I said YES!

 

My Life Needs More Adventure

What would happen if I got on a plane tomorrow? What would happen if I called in sick and told my ex I needed him to take the kids for the weekend? What would happen if I just ran away for a few days?

Somewhere warm and tropical and away from here. Just me and a beach and a good book. Maybe some fruity cocktails.

I bet the world wouldn’t fall apart. I bet life would just keep ticking on. Tick, tick, tick.

I wish I was going to do it. But I’m pretty sure I won’t. I’m pretty sure I’ll go into the office just like every other day. My life needs more adventure.

Dreaming of Vacation

DidgeridooJanuary was supposed to be about dreaming for me and I’ve been dreaming about going on vacation. It started with talks of going down south and then morphed into discussing a trip to Australia. But as it gets closer to making a decision, I think that Australia probably isn’t going to happen.

I just got my ex’s work schedule for the next several months and it would appear that he has the market cornered on travel. That means that I have my kids most of the time for May, June and July and it also means that I have to save at least a couple of weeks of my vacation for the summer. Since I only have 3 weeks of vacation, I don’t think I can make the long trek to Australia this year.

It hasn’t been 100% decided, but I think it is probably 75% decided that it is a ‘no go’. It doesn’t mean that I can’t go anywhere. I can still make plans for a week down south in-between my ex’s frequent work jaunts. And I think I can probably get creative with some long weekends in there. Or even regular weekends. We live in a beautiful area and a few hours drive will take us to other beautiful areas.

And if you are exploring with a great companion, it will still be fun.

Month 12 Check-In

December has been over for a few days but figuring out my wisdom for 2014 took longer than I thought it would. Who knew that I had learned so much? Anyway, here is my final check-in for 2013, in case you were wondering if it was coming.

I’m not really sure what happened in December. I remember frantically getting ready for Christmas. I remember baking with the kids and us attempting to decorate a gingerbread carousel. I remember present wrapping and unwrapping. I remember last-minute errands and visiting family. I remember arguments, laughter and love. But the rest is just a whirlwind of busyness.

I wish I could say I wrote, ate healthy and exercised. Well, I did write, just not my book… Ah well, there’s always 2014.

Here’s the round-up for the rest of my overall goals:

Eating more fruits and veggies/ day – I’m quite sure there were days in December where I didn’t eat one fruit or vegetable :(. I also put some weight on for Christmas. However, I am still down 10 pounds for the year so I’m happy. I just need to eat better!!

Exercising – I think that the only exercising I did this month was one session of yoga and several sessions of shovelling. I also made it to badminton one time this month. As I’ve already said, there’s always 2014. I did find out that there is a free skate at lunch time 3 days/ week close to where I work, so I’m going to try to get there at least one day/ week in the future. I’m not a good skater but every little bit helps.

Blog 4 times/ week – As 2014 came to an end I struggled to meet my blogging goals but I have decided to continue on and keep blogging. Yay!  I think I will aim for 2-3 times/ week as opposed to 4 but we will see what happens as the year goes on. The reason I decided to keep blogging was really because of the Winter Solstice Ritual. It was really great to look back over everything from the past year. It made the learnings more tangible and made me feel like I really accomplished something so I will soldier on and see what 2014 brings.

Putting myself out there more and creating better relationships – I had one friend lunch this month and the work Christmas party and New Year’s eve so I did OK with putting myself out there. Plus I hung out with my big, old family and that was awesome.

52 Actions – I tried to make December pretty easy and I did OK with my weekly goals. I think I’m going to keep them up for 2014, I may even re-use a few. But I also think that I will try to do less each week. Working full-time makes it a bit trickier to get some things done but I’m sure I can manage some small actions.IMG_20131231_204109

General happiness – Am I happier? Yep. Why just today I marvelled over a beautiful sunset, some deer I spotted on the way home and the great deal I got at Wal-mart. I was even pretty happy about the warm hot chocolate I drank while trying to warm up from the cold. And look how happy I look (even if I’m a little fuzzy).

2013 was a great year!! I declare it complete!

One other thing I like from the Winter Solstice Ritual is taking the month of January as a time to dream and then starting the new year in February. So there will be no goals or actions for January, just a time to dream and think of the possibilities for the rest of the year. Thanks for following my exploits in 2013, and here’s to more learning, love and laughter in 2014.

Month 11 Check-In

I’m a few days late getting this blog post up but, better late than never.

November feels like a blur. I was sick, my youngest was sick, I had family over for the last weekend in November so that required some prep, plus I was also adjusting to being back to work. Throw a little bit of Christmas shopping into the mix, the regular ups and downs of being a parent and bam, 4 weeks is gone.

I wish I could say I succeeded with my challenge for the month, however, the catching up on my writing course was limited in nature and so was the healthy eating. As a matter of fact, my diet is a disaster area these days. I need to bring it back into a better realm of healthy.

Here’s the round-up for the rest of my overall goals:

Eating more fruits and veggies/ day – There were some smoothies this month, of course, but not as many as there should have been. However, if chocolate was a food group I would have it covered. Somehow, I am down one pound which is a total of 14 lbs for the year. I seem to have plateaued at this point but luckily I’m not putting any weight on so I will take it.

Exercising – Exercise has also declined as the month passed. I haven’t been to badminton for the last 2 weeks as I’ve had my kids during that time and the last walk I took was only 15 minutes because it was so cold out. I’m supposed to play squash tomorrow night, so barring any cancellations maybe that will help motivate me to get back to exercising.

Blog 4 times/ week – I’ve struggled to meet my blogging goal for the last 3 months and as the year is drawing to a close I’m wondering if I will continue blogging into 2014. I haven’t made any decisions yet but I am thinking about letting it go. We’ll see, still a few more weeks before the year is over.

Putting myself out there more and creating better relationships – I’ve had a couple of lunches with co-workers this month, I also had lunch with a co-worker from my last job and dinner with another. It’s funny how hard it is to coordinate things when you no longer see each other every day but I will keep trying, it is worth it. And as for Sven, it’s been hard seeing him this month too. Between kid schedules and being sick, we didn’t see each other all that much during the month of November.

52 Actions – I wish I was doing better with my weekly goals. I didn’t fail completely this month but I wasn’t overly successful either. For some reason they are no longer top of mind or maybe they are just things I don’t really want to do. Something to think about.

General happiness – Overall, I think I have learned a lot about how to be happier during this past year. It is so important to live in the present. To stop worrying about what may or may not happen in the future and to stop obsessing about what has happened in the past. Some days these things are easier said than done but if you can stick to the present, life will be better. I think that is the key.

Only 28 days left to 2013, where has the year gone? During these last 4 weeks I will try to review some of the stuff I have learned during this past year of blogging and make plans for 2014. Not sure what they are yet, but I’ll figure it out :).

Tag Cloud