Taking on 2013 and hoping to revitalize my life

Posts tagged ‘health’

Witches’ Brew

Honey

Honey (Photo credit: quisnovus)

My youngest gave me a bad cold.

Yesterday, I stayed home from work because I felt so lousy. Today, I dragged myself back in because I’ve only had my job for a month so I felt like I had to. However, surprisingly, after lunch, I started to feel better. I’m still snuffly and blowing my nose but I didn’t feel like I needed to curl up under my desk to have a nap so that seems like a turn for the better in my books.

Last winter, at the first sign of any sniffles I dosed myself with cinnamon and honey tea and managed to stave off any and all colds. I have been less diligent this year and hence the reason why I’m sick now. My oldest is also a firm believer in the honey and cinnamon tea but the youngest won’t drink it. Remember how I said she was stubborn? So, she gets sick the most often and does her best to share it with everyone.

Today I was talking with someone who is in the process of creating health and wellness products from raw honey. He is an advocate for the benefits of raw honey and has had great success with it for the last 7 years. When he heard I was sick, he told me to go home and drink honey, cinnamon, lemon and ginger tea. So on my way home from work I picked up a lemon and ginger root to go with my cinnamon and honey.

The whole thing is a little bit of a slurry. The cinnamon doesn’t mix well and leaves a kind of a film on top and I didn’t filter the lemon juice so there are bits of pulp in there plus slices of ginger. If you were to look at it you might think it looked a bit like a witches’ brew.

It’s actually not that bad. And on the advice of my sister I added some rum. I love you Sis!!

So I’m drinking the concoction in the hopes of feeling much better. Luckily it doesn’t taste as bad as it looks as apparently I have to keep drinking it tomorrow. If you have a cold, I dare you to drink the same concoction and let me know what you think. If you don’t care for it that much, just add more rum, then you just won’t care!

Wishing healthy vibes to you all. Cheers!

Ups and Downs of the New Job

laptop

laptop (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I spent a whole year slouching on my couch with my laptop literally in my lap. My tennis elbow got better, I didn’t have any neck or back issues, and I was feeling pretty good. I have been back at work for less than 3 weeks and my back and neck are already giving me troubles.

There is something about sitting at a desk that is killing me.

They are ordering me a laptop stand so that should help but I’m in trouble if I’m already having issues. One of my problems is that I tend to lean on one elbow while I’m sitting at my desk. I have to break that habit and break it quick. It causes some of the muscles in my back to tense up which makes my back hurt.

I think I see more yoga and stretching in my future.

As for work, it’s going well. I am learning A LOT. But I’m also sharing some of my knowledge which is pretty cool. I think sometimes I don’t give myself enough credit for the things that I know but this week I have been a font of information and I feel like I am already contributing to doing things better on the marketing team (we’re a team of 2). I haven’t been as busy as I would like and have had to kind of make up my own work the last couple of days but things are coming together and I still think this is a good fit for me.

I am missing the luxury of time afforded to me in my days of unemployment. Things are busier now. I still have free time as I only have my kids half of the time but there is definitely less of it. I haven’t adjusted to my new life with a job yet. I need to give up some of my time-wasting habits to make time for the things that I really want.

So I guess you have to take the good with the bad and it’ll all come out in the wash. Hopefully, I’ll figure out the whole ergonomics thing soon as I’d like to get that resolved ASAP.

The First Falling Out – More Dating Adventures

Angry Penguin

Angry Penguin (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Sven and I had our first falling out last night.

We’ve been seeing each other for 6 weeks but I’m not really sure you could call us a couple. I guess we fall under the category of “dating”. Neither one of us is seeing anyone else and we’ve seen a fair amount of each other in the last 6 weeks but things have been going very slow. I’m OK with that, normally I rush into things so slower is a good change of pace this time.

However this slowness does not mean that nothing is happening. Yesterday I bared a little bit of my soul to Sven and I was surprised by the response. Perhaps surprised is the wrong word, more like miffed or upset or just generally pissed off. He treated the whole thing with a kind of nonchalance or even dismissal that I didn’t appreciate. I explained why I was upset and he said that he felt like a jerk about it but I don’t feel better.

I’ve been trying to deal with my angry feelings, I wrote about them last night to try to acknowledge and release them but the positive result was short-lived. The angry feelings keep returning. I know that I will forgive him at some point but right now I’m irritated and I can’t seem to let it go. I thought that if I messaged him today and told him how I felt I could finally resolve things. He agrees that we should talk but wants to do it in person so that puts everything on the back burner.

I need to resolve this for me NOW. I don’t want to carry these angry feelings around all weekend. I need to dispel them, I need to figure out how to move past them. You would think that I would have the tools at my disposal to alleviate this anger but personal growth is hard work. I’m hoping that writing things out here will help and I think I will try meditating this afternoon. I want to have a good weekend and free myself from negativity.

Maybe some exercise will do the trick. I should go for a walk and clear my head. Time to get off the computer I guess ;).

How Secrets Hold Us Back

I have a secret. In fact, I have more than one secret.

And I’m not talking about the ‘surprise party’ type of secret; the good secret that will eventually be revealed to a chorus of cheers and rave reviews. I’m talking about bad secrets. The secrets we keep because of embarrassment or fear. The secrets we keep because we don’t want to be judged or pitied or both. The secrets we keep because we don’t want to make other people uncomfortable.

Eve covers herself and lowers her head in sham...

Eve covers herself and lowers her head in shame in Rodin’s sculpture “Eve after the Fall”. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

We don’t want other people to know that we acted so rash or foolishly. We don’t want to bare our inadequacies. We don’t want others to know that something happened to us that made us ashamed.

As a matter of fact, my big secrets are all shame-based. I don’t want to be judged by others so I turn that thing into a secret and tuck it away, push it down, and try to hide it. The problem with keeping shame-based secrets hidden is that they don’t go away. They may be buried under other things in your life, but they still haunt your dreams and take away a piece of you.

These secrets diminish us and hold us back. They keep us from our full potential.  We value other’s opinions over our own well-being. We care what other people think just a little too much to let go of our secret.

But here’s the problem with that. Keeping your secret from others does not help you resolve your issue. It doesn’t help you come to terms with what happened. It doesn’t help you move past it or at least figure out how to deal with it in the future. It does keep others from feeling uncomfortable for a bit, it does keep others from judging you on the topic (at this moment), it does keep them from feeling sorry for you or from being angry at you. But that is not the truth. Their actions or non-actions, thoughts or non-thoughts are a result of you harbouring your secret.

Some secrets are bigger than others I will admit. Some cut deep and cause pain. Some prevent you from living your life. And those are the worst kind of secrets. In order for you to truly live your life you have to let them out. Set them free.

I’m not saying that telling your secret will fix everything. In fact, things may get worse for a while. But it will start the internal healing process for you. You will be able to address it, accept it, put it into perspective, and maybe even figure out how to heal things and move forward.

Secrets don’t go away when we try to smother them, they sit festering below the surface of your life. They are wounds that need to be healed.

And as for me, well here is a secret that kept me frozen and afraid for many years: I got fired. I know, lots of people get fired, but it happened to me and I was mortified. I didn’t want anyone to know. How was I going to find another job?

That was in 1998 and it still bothers me a little bit to this day. In some ways it made me afraid and think less of myself, my confidence had taken a beating. The shame affected not only my work-life but my home-life too. I really think that the way I dealt with it was the beginning of the end of my marriage. The secret shame that I was carrying around weighed on me heavily.

But I am no longer going to be shamed by it. It happened. It’s in the past.

I’m sure some people will think getting fired is no big deal, but it changed who I was and who I am. I am no longer going to let it bother me. It was a lifetime ago. I am stronger than that now. So I am telling you all and taking away the power of the secret. I am letting it flow out of me, not to be harboured again. I have other secrets too but those are for another day and perhaps a smaller group of confidants. But for today I am releasing this one.

If you’re feeling brave, dig out one of your own secrets and let it go. Tell someone. Tell everyone. Embrace your faults, your trials and tribulations, your heartaches. They have made you who you are today whether you wanted them to or not. If you keep them secret they will continue to affect your life. If you free yourself by telling your secret, the power it holds over you will lessen and lessen.

Energy Healing

Recently, I’ve been spending a lot of time trying out some of the different methods of Energy Healing that are out there today. I guess it all started when I began looking into meditation, then I came across a project called Heal Your Life which was doing intro videos to things like Qi Gong, Tapping, Chakra healing, smile healing, etc. I tried out several but my favourite had to do with the chakras. I think part of the reason why is that the chakras have been around for a long time and are also part of the meditation program that I’m trying to master.

English: Chakra picture produced by AuraStar20...

English: Chakra picture produced by AuraStar2000TM bio-energy sensor (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

There are 7 chakras and each chakra affects different parts of your life. Chakras are thought to be centres of life force or energy.  You can have open/ strong or closed/ weak chakras and each chakra can act independently from one another or they can work together. Of course they are most powerful when they are all strong and working together. When  your chakras are strong or open, it is easier for good things to come into your life.

Based on the little bit of experimenting that I have done, my chakras are a mess, lol. But I think that the work I have done in the past 8 months has made some moderate improvements in them. I feel like that things are starting to head in the right direction for me.

I’m know I’m getting a little hippy-ish with talk of energy healing but I really believe that there are some viable options out there in terms of alternative medicine. Most of these forms of energy healing are based in ancient far East traditions and religions. They have been around for thousands of years. So who am I to dispute energy healing and meditation as methods to living a happier, more abundant life?

I have been practising an Abundance Mantra for several months now and I feel that it is helping me. Even if you don’t believe in energy healing or meditation you can’t dispute that focusing on the positive aspects of life is healthier than focusing on the negative.

If you spend all of your time enveloped in the negative, it doesn’t take long for you to develop a pretty negative opinion of everything and life itself. If you focus on the positive (which is sometimes difficult to do) then you have a greater chance to see opportunities that are presented to you, you have a healthier outlook on life and you are a happier person in general.

I know that some days I complain about my life and the fact that I have been unemployed for 10 months but the fact is that I have been on a great journey during this time which probably would not have been possible if I had been working and stressed like in my previous job. And that journey has led me to explore energy healing and I kind of like it. Maybe you should check it out too.

A Message from my Inner-Wise Self

SARK

SARK

I watched a video from SARK, Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy, you can find it on her website AwakenWithSark.com. She promises to help me (and anyone else who watches her videos) to connect with my (their) personal power. I haven’t read any of her books but my sister has so I decided why not, what have I got to lose?

I recommend watching it. Maybe you won’t believe that you can connect with your inner-wise self, maybe you won’t even believe that you have one. But I believe that I have something inside of me that can help me. I believe that I can access an inner peace and inner joy if I can find the right key. I believe that I can live a life of passion and worth. I seem to be having trouble finding the key though. I’m hoping that her program will help me.

The big thing that she has you do during this video is write a note to yourself from your inner-wise self. Recently, yesterday as a matter of fact, I had a bit of a revelation that I often don’t feel like I am enough. I don’t feel like I know enough or am smart enough, I don’t feel like I am talented enough, I don’t feel like I am skinny enough, attractive enough, nice enough. I don’t feel like I am enough. I try to quiet my inner self critic but it doesn’t always work. So today I am enlisting the help of my inner-wise self to help me silence my inner self critic. Here is the letter my inner-wise self wrote to me:

Ah, my beauty, I miss you and love you. You are enough! Even when you feel less than, know that you are enough. You are beautiful and wise and you can do whatever you want to do. Don’t be afraid to shine, don’t be afraid to expose your inner thoughts and beauty. Those who love you like I do love every part of you and they will always be there. You are not alone. I am with you, in your heart, soul and spirit. I am your hand to hold when you need it. Embrace me like I do you. For you are enough.

I’m looking forward to the follow-up videos. They promise to help me find my creative dream courage. They promise to help my creativity flow. I would like that. And I would like to find my personal power for I seem to have lost it along the way.

I Love Walking

walkingWhile I was out doing my regular loop around the neighbourhood, a thought popped into my head. The thought was, “I love walking”. It felt a little weird for some reason, I guess I always knew that I enjoyed walking but it seemed weird to frame a specific thought around it.

Part of the reason why I enjoy walking more now than I used to is that I tend to be more in the present while walking. I like to focus on the strength in my legs, the feel of my muscles, the breeze blowing, and the outdoor sounds. The other big reason I like it is because walking makes me feel healthy.

Just under two years ago, I had some kind of infection in my thigh. The doctors weren’t 100% sure what it was, but, they thought it could have been cellulitis. Anyway, the infection was debilitating, I could barely walk. But being a single mom, I kept going to work and running errands, looking after things even though I could barely limp around some days.

The whole thing was pretty scary. They didn’t know what it was and the regular antibiotics weren’t working. At one point they gave me the super-bug antibiotics and told me to continue to take the regular ones at the same time. That eventually did the trick but in the meantime I hobbled so much that I strained both of my ankles and they swelled up too.

This swelling caused me to think that the infection was spreading and I called my sister crying and having a minor panic attack. The doctors reassured me that the drugs were finally working and that my ankles were swollen due to strain and not infection.

I ended up going to physio to speed up the healing process and since then everything has been fine. But there is nothing like a good scare to make you appreciate your health a bit more.

So when I walk, I like to feel my muscles working and feeling strong. It’s a good feeling that reminds me how lucky I am to be healthy.

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